Conversations

Gage: Thunk!
Me: "Gage, do you have to find everything with your head?"

Me: "Gage keeps taking your socks out of your drawer. I'm not sure why."
Curtis: "Probably because he knows I'm not use finding them in there"

Me: "Sorry the laundry's not put away. Your clothes are in the baskets. Today wasn't laundry day."
Curtis: "What about yesterday?"
Me: "I went and got my hair done."
Curtis: "And the day before that?"
Me: "Grocery day."
Curtis "I think I see where this is going..."

Curtis met the neighbor behind us this past week. He's in his 50s, and he seemed normal. Curtis relayed their conversation to me.
Neighbor: Do you collect your aluminum cans?
Curtis: No, not really. We usually drink bottles of beer, but we have Coke cans and stuff too.
Neighbor: I'd appreciate it if you don't mind giving them to me...You can just throw them over the fence into my yard.

REALLY? Do we look like beer can throwing people? As if! We crush them against our foreheads like frat boys, of course!

MOM Conversations are always fun

Me: (MDO) is five hours of bliss, right?
Another Mom: Yes, I am going home to take a shower...and shave my legs.
Me: Yeah, it's nice to take a shower without interruptions. I get to shave maybe twice a week.
Other Mom: I'd just like to be able to put on my underwear without someone watching me.
Me: Or go to the bathroom alone. Gage likes to use my underwear as a ladder rung to crawl into my lap while I'm trying to pee.

I saw a friend's Facebook status today:
"I've learned a valuable lesson...you can remove silly putty from hair with oil."

Showering has turned into a challenge again. Mostly because Gage is too big for his Exersaucer (where I use to confine him while I showered) and not big enough to be left alone for 10 minutes. So, I get all smart and bring him INTO the bathroom with me. I had just mopped and disinfected everything, so it was fine if he Oh, I don't know, put his mouth on the toilet lid and blew zerberts like he did last week. (Again, the toilet was clean. Being a mom has forced me to consider the germ factors around my house, and it's never been more clean!) I throw some toys on the floor and start the water. Well, Gage likes to stand on the couch and pull back the curtains to look outside. So, pulling back the shower curtain was an obvious delight. Then he got to stick his hands into the shower water and managed to get the upper half of his body wet. So, I decide to go ahead and just put him in the tub. Of course, when I take off his diaper, I see he's pooped. So, I hose him off in the shower and sit him down once the poop has rinsed down the drain and proceed to shower, unphased. Because that's become a typical day in my life.