Gage: Seventeen Month Letter

Dear Wild-ling,

Your 17 months of life coincides with Mother's Day this year. This is officially my second Mother's Day, though technically it's my third because I knew I was pregnant with you in May of 2009. Today you were pretty much as good as I could have hoped for. You slept til 8am (such a great gift in and of itself!!) and we went to church, had lunch, and you took a good afternoon nap for me. You are so wild and crazy these days that it makes up for the horrendous fits you're throwing when you don't get your way. So, here's what's new with you.

You now have 12 teeth completely in. I can see your little canines are slowly coming in on the bottom because your little gums are swollen and you had a bit of a fever last weekend before the gums really started looking painful. I imagine they'll be here by your next letter.

You are starting to thin down a little and really look more like a boy and less like a baby. My, God, the WORDS!!! The words you're saying. You repeat everything now. You said "love you" the first time this week when your dad and I were exchanging "goodbye's" and "i love you's" as he left for work one morning. Today I got you to slowly repeat "Happy Mommy Day" to me, one word at a time. You also said "Happy Grandma Day" to my mom when we called to say Happy Mother's Day to her.

You also repeated "Shit" 5 or 6 times in the kitchen after I let it slip in front of you. We've decided to ignore it and not make a big deal of it as we learned our lesson about reacting to things we don't really want you to do again and again, especially in public. (Because sometime in the last month you were slapping your legs in the bath tub, and then starting slapping your little package and I was so surprised that I think my reaction got your attention and you ran around the house after your bath slapping your whole crotch while we tried not to cringe or laugh.)

I can't even begin to list all the words you know and things you can say. You know lots of animals,and you're learning their sounds. You like to "count" or "spell" things as we count your toes or spell words you understand when you're around. Like when I tell your dad I don't want you to know I left your "b-l-a-n-k-i-e" at home and I hope you don't notice. Your version of counting is pointing and making different sounds as you touch each object or thing. And the abc's and spelling are similar. You're just repeating the idea of different sounds in song or rhythm.

I sat you on your little potty chair for the first time this week. You have been trying to back up to the toilet and sit when I say I have to go to the bathroom and you follow me in there. And you say "potty", you're aware of being wet, and you tell me when you're poopy.

You are getting much more difficult to manage. This mostly means we are having to discipline you more than ever. I get it though. You're part me, and part your dad. The odds are stacked against you in the stubborn department. Thank God there's two of us and only one of you!

But, in the same measure of you being difficult, you're also growing sweeter. You love to give kisses and cuddle more. You're quick to give a kiss if you accidently hurt me or I act upset with how you're treating me. You love to play with us and by yourself.

We've taken you to play in the water a couple of times now, and you're just ridculously happy by it. I know I will be taking you as often as I can to play at the splash pads and pool.

I think you're pretty damn smart. I know I'm your mom, but other people comment on your vocabulary and I am constantly surprised by what you recognize and remember, I swear the weirdest thing happened today at lunch. We went to Panera for my lunch choice. The one that your grandma and I took you to several months ago. Like before you turned one. Today we walked in the door and you took off and walked right up to the same table we had sat at inside of Panera with your grandma. I was pretty shocked. You walked through and around several tables and then walked right up to the table and stopped like you knew where we were going. It was bizarre, kiddo.

Your dad and I have launched off on our own now and he's working for himself. That means that all the work he gets comes from my marketing skills and people's word of mouth advertising. This scares me pretty badly at certain moments. It's really stressful, and I should apologize to you for all the yelling that's been going on here at home lately. But, your dad is so motivated and he tells you all the time that we are building a future for you so that you can take over the business and run it or sell it for a profit someday. Just one less thing for you to have to worry about. Your dad says he doesn't want you to have to struggle and work hard for things like we've had to. He just wants you to have the choice to have a part of our family business. A successful one. I just want to be able to pay for your college and maybe have a nice house for you to grow up in. One that you won't be embarrassed to have friends over to. And, if I think about being a little more shallow for a minute, I wouldn't mind having time and money for the gym and tanning and the spa every now and again.

Sweet boy, everything we do is so much about you. We want this to be successful for your future. We care so much for you and you're such a special gift from God. You're the light in my cloudy days. You really are my little sunshine. Your innocence reminds me to slow down and appreciate the world as it is. You teach me how to be an example for you. You are so very loved and I can't imagine life any other way than being your mommy and being married to your daddy. Things will alway get tough in life, but I know we are trying to teach you that you can rest in Jesus and always find peace and comfort, even if we aren't there with you.

I can't believe next month you'll be a year and a half old. I might skip that letter and have two shots of tequila to numb the pain of losing my baby to childhood. I pray you'll stay sweet and carefree for as long as you want. I know your dad and I had to grow up a little too quickly in some ways and I want you to be a kid and enjoy it for a very long time. Don't grow up too fast, little man.

We love you more than you'll ever know, Gage.

Love, Mommy